The Stumbling Block is often the key to why people fail to make long lasting changes. As Coaches and Psychologists we help people identify goals and steps to those goals, in order to make change. For example, going on a diet might involve setting a goal to start eating healthily or less on Monday. By the time it’s the weekend, often people say they have been ‘naughty or bad’ by eating a takeaway or drinking too much alcohol. They then tell themselves they’ve gone off track so they may as well eat unhealthily the following day, before starting to be ‘good’ again on Monday. This pattern may happen more than once, and they give up the diet as there’s no point if they’re going off track every day. Does this sound familiar?
The same mindset often applies to smokers trying to give up. They set a goal to not buy any cigarettes, throw away any they have, and avoid places where they may be tempted. However, when stressed they might have a lapse and either ask someone for a cigarette or buy a packet. They then decide there’s no point in continuing with the goal of stopping as they’ve already gone off track so they may as well just start smoking again.
In the two examples above, the stumbling block is the automatic thought. This is the thought that enters your head and gives you a reason to either continue with the change or not. In the first example, the automatic thought that ‘I’ve been naughty with food so I may as well continue that way’ is an example of a stumbling block. In the second example, the thought that ‘I’ve gone off track so I might as well just smoke again’ is the stumbling block.
Stumbling block = automatic thought. By becoming more aware of your automatic thought, you can focus on the block to making long lasting change. There’s no point in making goals and then stopping making changes if you’re not aware of your thoughts and mindset. In my work as a CBT coach, I can help you to make long lasting changes to work, health, lifestyle or any other area that you struggle with. By looking at the automatic thought and the beliefs associated with it, we can change longstanding patterns and styles of thinking. Questions, stillness, meditation and mindfulness are techniques that can help you to access those underlying subconscious beliefs that fuel the thoughts.
